seasons

seasons

I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about what I want to do with this space. The blog has changed over the years with a different focus or a positive or more complaining tone. It was time to clear it out again and to make some choices about what I need. To everything there is a season.

First, I still need a place to process. I am still exploring me. I feel like I have said everything and I don’t want to get back in the habit of just complaining. But there are things I need and want to work on and I know talking about them publicly helps.

Second, I need the conversation. Blogs seem to have gone out of style and those people who used to visit here mostly don’t come by anymore. People go on to other parts of their lives and yes, it hurts my feelings but I do understand that my blog is not the center of the universe. The things I write are not of interest to everyone. I found out last fall when that huge group of people came over because my blog was linked by a popular blogger – I don’t want that. I would like more than a handful of blogging friends but I’d rather have a few than a huge, nameless crowd of several hundred people. I didn’t feel like I could be honest. I really enjoyed meeting a few of those people – it was the crowd that scared me.

Third, I need to be positive. Not pollyanna-positive and not lying-to-myself positive, but not focusing on just how hard change is. And I also need to be honest. I need to be able to say that I can see myself dying right now. If I don’t make changes, healthy changes, I will die. Not immediately, of course, but my blood sugars are awful, I keep gaining weight, I’m less active and in more pain, I don’t sleep, I’m having breathing issues. I cannot just keep going down the same path.

And that’s where the blog comes in. It’s all about the journey, trying different things, talking with people. I’d like to attract some more readers interested in these issues but I don’t know how to do that. I do want to include more photography – I want to get out and do more with my camera. I need some creative outlets. I plan to keep cooking. Cooking is both creative and generally a lot healthier than processed foods.

I will undoubtedly talk about other things in life – you know, dementia and kitties and gardening and whatnot. I don’t think I’m capable of a single focus niche blog. I just don’t want to feel like all I do is complain.

So that’s where I am. A new season for the blog. Spring, I think, which is often full of hope and rebirth.

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10 thoughts on “seasons”

  1. A blog is whatever you make it and what you want it to be. That’s the beauty of it. I keep posting when I feel like writing and often go back and read over what I’ve written to help me figure things out. So, it’s more for me than others, although I do love comments. (who doesn’t?) I love your musings, your recipes(makes me want to cook) and your vulnerability, which makes me feel closer to you since I also feel vulnerable and alone these days. Spring is a lovely season. I used to hate both spring and fall, but now love them; they are transition seasons and full of change and potential.

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    1. You’re right Margaret, it’s mostly for me. It’s a hard balance for me to let myself be vulnerable and open and to not feel like I’m scaring people away with being too honest. I need the conversation, otherwise I might as well be writing offline. But I don’t need huge crowds.

      It is a transition season. At least, that’s the plan. Potential!

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  2. I’m glad to see you back. 🙂 Nice blog design!

    I’d like to attract some more readers interested in these issues but I don’t know how to do that.

    One way is to do some google searches for bloggers talking about the same things and leave a comment.

    You know, I have spoken before of my friend who has lost a lot of weight via Nutri-system combined with pretty much daily gym visits. It has worked for him, I have no idea if it would work for me, or for you, or anyone else. But he works full time so the fact of not having to worry about what to cook is helpful and useful for him.

    A lot of people speak about paleo and that working for them – I tried it, it wasn’t for me. A bit too much meat for my liking. Though I could have included a lot more vegetables, I did not have the kind of time I would like to do that back then. But I did like some of the aspects of it – more coconut has found its way into my regular diet – coconut oil, coconut cream and milk.

    Anyway, I’m here still reading, will be here as long as you are typing. 🙂

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    1. Yeah, I know that reaching out to other bloggers is a more effective way to meet people than to wait for them to come to me. But it’s also emotionally risky and just not where I am right now. So I may just need to be patient as I work to get started moving forward again. When I feel more established here I can start to reach out to others.

      As far as diets and eating plans go – I know more about what doesn’t work for me than exactly what will work. I don’t do extremes or fads because I will not stick to them. Right now, I’m just tracking what I eat (using myfitnesspal, which is free) and trying to listen to my body’s needs without judgment. I know that writing it down is important for me, at least for now.

      Thanks for coming by. I’m always glad to see you.

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  3. I love your new Z with the kitty perched on top in the corner. I commented on your other post about the boat with a view, but not sure it took. Could be my insanely out of date browser at work.

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    1. Thank you Lel. It’s always nice to see you. Your comment showed up on the boat story. You just haven’t been here since I moved the archives and reset the blog, so WP thought you were a stranger.

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  4. I know how you feel. While I agree that theoretically your blog is to do what you will with it, I know that practically if you want conversation you need to write posts that resonate with the people who read your blog. It’s a conundrum that I face all the time.

    Perhaps throughout the Spring we will both figure out what we want to do next. Or how to do what we’re doing now in a different way. Time will tell, I guess.

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    1. And you need to find or attract those people with whom the posts might resonate. I hope we both find what we’re looking for. I can say that I’ve come to hate facebook and twitter even more so I know I won’t be headed that direction.

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  5. I didn’t like Facebook at all, either but I love Twitter. I hardly tweet but I like to read the constant updates. This blog looks really sharp!

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    1. Thank you Hannah! There are still some things I’m tweaking – for example, still playing with the header. I have another logo that I’ve never posted that I think is clever. And I just don’t know about the links to my other projects…. except for Chickens & Eggs, they are so out of date!

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