I was saving them for one post.
1) That stupid Swiffer commercial. Seriously. I thought it was sort of cute the first time I saw it but now that they’re showing it every few minutes, I’m ready to take my Swiffers and throw them out the door. Even though I mute the commercial, the song sticks in my head anyway. And I don’t even watch much TV. I’m probably going to shut down Dish because it’s silly to be paying for something I might turn on for an hour or so late at night. I do watch Hulu and Swiffer apparently bought all the commercial slots for the DIY type shows and they repeat the commercial ad nauseum.
2) Chefs that insist the only way to eat something is the way they like it. I love Mario Batali and Michael Symon. But if they keep telling me how Americans put too much sauce on pasta and how pasta should only be eaten with just enough sauce to coat – I may have to hunt them down. I like a lot of tomato sauce and/or vegetables on my pasta. I like it that way. I’ll say it again. I LIKE IT THAT WAY. And it has the added benefit of getting extra vegetables into my diet and decreasing the amount of pasta I eat. I also like my hamburgers cooked all the way through and I don’t have to cook them until they’re hockey pucks in order to do that. I don’t eat my steaks well done anymore, but when I did I was capable of cooking them through and not turning them into dry, hard leather. If I can do it, surely a chef could do it. And even Julia Child thought I should eat my scrambled eggs runny. Can’t stand them that way. I make perfect, for me, scrambled eggs cooked low and slow and done without being hard and rubbery or soft and slimy. I value what I can learn from chefs and professional cooks but some things are a matter of personal taste, not cooking gospel.
3) Speaking of cooking, referring to anything made in a restaurant as “homemade.” Really? homemade in a restaurant? What? The chef takes it home and cooks it then brings it back? It’s scratch-made, guys. If the pastry chef makes a crust from scratch that’s great – but he or she did not make it at home. I hope. Similarly, please don’t tell me that your restaurant is just like eating at home. I don’t go to restaurants to eat home cooking. I want something better. If I can make it at home why would I pay restaurant prices? If I’m paying for it, it damn well better taste extra good and be enough trouble I wouldn’t make it at home.
4) General Hospital – 50 years. I’ve seen this being celebrated and I’m not dissing on the whole show, I haven’t watched it since I was a kid and watched it with my mom when I was home sick from school. Genie Francis was on The Chew last week and everyone was gushing about their favorite Luke and Laura moment and I’m sorry, what I remember most about Luke and Laura was the rape. It was the first time I was introduced to the idea that women really want to be raped and it repelled me. Even as a kid, I didn’t understand how she could “love” him and marry him after he raped her. Romantic couple my ass.